Tsunami Ezra

Ok y’all. So there I was, lying in bed missing my little babe even though he was asleep in his rocker literally right next to the bed. All I wanted was to snuggle him and kiss the top of his sweet head. I tell my husband who then proceeds to tell me to pick him up. So like an idiot I listen to him and pick up my sleeping baby because I have no idea what’s coming next.

After picking up Ezra, I noticed his diaper was wet and needed to be changed so I take him to the changing table to do a quick diaper change. Wrong. I took off his wet diaper and stupidly let my guard down for 2.25 seconds only to look back at him and notice he’s peeing everywhere. Literally everywhere. Kid is straight up peeing in his face, it’s running down behind his head and soaking his hair, and his onesie is soaked. So I did what any mom would do and I just throw a diaper at him like I’m putting out a grease fire. If you’re ever put in this situation, I don’t recommend this method because the pee was just splashing off of the diaper and splattering all over him. Moving on.

So I strip down my kid and carry him to the bathroom butt naked and tell him not to crap in my hand on the way. Well apparently he’s a good listener because he did not poop on me. We make it to the bathroom and I’m sitting on the toilet holding him waiting for the water to warm up when suddenly my BUTT NAKED baby starts peeing. AGAIN. So here’s a little secret into my personal life. I spend 90% of my time at home with a nursing bra and no shirt on because this kid eats more than a 900 lb. man, so don’t just show up at my house because I won’t have a shirt on. 🤷🏼‍♀️ #momlife (am I right?!) Anyways, he pees all over himself and me this time. He soaks my bra, my belly, and he even manages to somehow pee into my mouth. I’m dead y’all. Now I also need a shower. The water finally gets warm enough so I put him in there and start bathing him when suddenly he rips one in the tub. I instantly snatch him out of the tub and sit him on the toilet like a grown man and allow him to let it all out. He obviously didn’t appreciate my efforts because he starts screaming. I get him back in the tub and get him all clean and then Sam takes him to the changing table to put his diaper on him. Once again we didn’t make it in time and now he has peed all over Sam. Cool. So now Sam and I both need a shower.

I finally get the naked baby dressed and he’s hungry so I feed him. Well wouldn’t you know that he spits up all over me when eating? I mean why not? It’s dripping down my body, it’s on my pillow, it’s on the sheets, and all over his face and body. *slams face into the wall 917 times +1 more just to make sure I’m feeling good and dead*

So I learned some valuable lessons today:

1. Don’t ever wake a sleeping baby because you feel like snuggling.

2. Don’t ever listen to your husband because men don’t know anything.

3. Don’t ever take for granted the peepee teepees you were given to prevent these situations from ever happening.

So if you have a baby boy or have one on the way, get you some off these fine boogers. Greatest invention ever link here. They have disposable ones that you can buy, or you can buy these and be good to the environment.

Now I’m going to go finally cook dinner and then go to bed with all the bodily fluids I’m wearing and just skip the shower because that’s who I am as a person. Here’s to you, Tsunami Ezra. Here’s to you. 🍻

Megan out. ✌🏻

Massage Yo Baby!

I’m not going to lie, I only bought one book during my pregnancy and only read one chapter. If you read tons of books during your pregnancy, good for you. I’m not that kind of person and really just wanted to wing the whole thing. After Ezra was born, I realized the value behind having somewhat of a routine and remembering that book had several sections to help establish a routine. So I picked up the book that I bought and read the sections on routines so I would have some guidance in making my own.

The author of the book suggested bathing your baby every night and and then giving your baby a massage to comfort him before bed. We started doing that and I remember I bought some baby massage oil prior to Ezra’s arrival. He LOVES this massage oil. Idk what it is about the oil, but he coos and is way more relaxed than with any lotion we have used- even lotion that has lavender in it. I love this oil because its ingredients are 100% natural and plant based and easily absorb into the skin without leaving a greasy residue. Score.

I also did a lot of research on baby massages just to see what the benefits really are of massaging your baby every night. There are many benefits for both baby AND mom (or dad, or whoever is doing the massage). Baby massages promote physical, developmental, and emotional health for infants. The physical touch promotes bonding and physical attachment between mom and baby. The soothing effects of the massage assists with weight gain and overall growth because it reduces cortisol levels (stress hormone) which encourages good eating habits and longer periods of sleep in babies. Let me say it a little louder for the people in the back- IT PROMOTES LONGER PERIODS OF SLEEP! Enough reason for me to jump on ship. Infant massage is so important and so heavily researched that 38% of NICUs perform daily massages on preterm babies in order to promote weight gain and decrease hospital stays by 3-6 days. The recommended time is 15 minutes/ day. Urm hello, positive research here people!

So here is how our nightly routine goes: bathe Ezra at 9 pm, give him a massage with Young Living’s Seedlings Baby Oil, put on pajamas, drink a bottle of mommy’s finest milk, sit up for 20 minutes after eating to reduce spit up, and then go to bed. He only wakes up once in the night to eat and the time is getting closer and closer to us waking up in the morning. Last night he didn’t wake up until 4:50 in the morning and he’s only 5 weeks old. The research has proven itself to be true and I’m taking it as a parenting win!!!

If you have baby oil, try it! If not and want to try some, here’s the link of the stuff I recommend: Seedlings Baby Oil

Moral of the story? MASSAGE YO BABY!